Dealing with hurts

Are offences the result of inadvertent actions and inactions or they are the product of ill nature and foul intentions?

We expect people to live up to our anticipated benchmark in the way they relate with us. Any conduct or speech toward us which fall short of our expected standard, we consider it as having been executed out of ill nature or foul intentions.
Hastily, we conclude that we are not being duly regarded by our offenders, and therefore we should react in such a way to reinstate our sense of significance and dignity. We do our best to convince our wrongdoers that we are worth more than they regard us.

The hurt intensifies when these individuals who have rubbed us the wrong way fail to recognize the offensive nature of their actions and demonstrate no sense of guilt. The detrimental extent, where the verbalization our hurts is met with cold indifference or an uncompromising debate, transfigures the hurt into bitterness, and bitterness soon matures into hatred.

Why do people offend us?

Are we right if we react in anger?

What are the best ways of handling our hurts, so we do not ruin our relationships?

Offences are inevitable. We do not feel offended because we are lacking in good character or bereft of love. We are all imperfect, and so, we can neither avoid being hurt nor hurting other people. “Forgive, that you shall be forgiven” is the best policy in handling offences. Are you perfect? If not, then forgive your offender today, because you may also need another person’s forgiveness some day (or who knows if it will be the same person you are refusing to forgive).

Our hurts are a cost to us since we are happier people without them, and when happy, we work more effectively and achieve more. Harboring hurts will not augur well for our personal integrity. We gain more than we lose when we let go of our hurts. Hurts slow us down in the race of life, since they make us spend far too much time thinking about the past than reaching toward our future goals.

Hurts are like wounds- they take time to heal. It takes love and humility to forgive, and it takes God’s grace and time to be healed of the hurt.

“Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath.” (Ephesians 4:26)

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